Yahrtzeit for my son by Sherri Mandell
Jerusalem Post, May 2, 2002
Shabbat was the yahrtzeit of my son Koby, stoned to death at the age
of 13 by Arab terrorists one year ago when he and his friend Yosef Ish-Ran
went hiking near our home. The terrorists battered the two boys so badly
that they were identifiable only by dental records.
On this Shabbat, the anniversary of the double murder, another Israeli
child, Danielle Shefi, 5, was murdered by Palestinian terrorists in her
bedroom, shot point blank in the head.
Three innocent children murdered purposefully, the murderers nurtured
by the lies of Palestinian propaganda insisting that killing Jews is their
holy mission.
On Sunday, to mark the year, hundreds of people went hiking in the canyon
behind our house where the boys were killed. For the first time, I saw
the cave where the boys were bludgeoned to death. It is a large stone
cavern with a small door. From outside you can see the Judean desert and
the jagged cliffs and clefts of limestone.
You would never know that this was the site of such horror and pain.
The cave has been cleaned of the boys' blood which the murderers had wiped
all over its walls. There is the sound of the wind instead of the cry
of screams. Yesterday each person bent his head at the doorway and stepped
into the cave to light a memorial candle.
Looking at the glimmering light, I was reminded of the Children's Memorial
at Yad Vashem where one candle is reflected, so that the light keeps expanding.
When we Jews are faced with tragedy and despair, most of us look toward
the light, trying to magnify and expand the light, trying to move forward
toward more and more life. That is how we sanctify life.
After the procession of flag carrying children and adults hiked through
the canyon, we walked up to the grassy lawn for the memorial ceremony.
There were many speakers and not one spoke of giving in to despair, not
one spoke of vengeance or retribution. Instead they spoke of moving toward
the light, of increasing the light.
Shaul Goldstein, the head of Gush Etzion, remarked that Danielle Shefi
was shot to death by a terrorist disguised as an Israeli soldier. My son
Koby, was battered by men who looked like Arab shepherds.
Instead they were killers, cold blooded murderers supported and encouraged
by a society that honors the death of their own children in suicide bombings
and teaches its young that if they die killing innocent Israelis, they
are martyrs instead of murderers.
It is inconceivable and yet it is true: the murder of Jews is sanctioned
by many European and all Arab states because the world indulges the charade
that destruction and evil is a justified response to Palestinian despair,
a despair that is promoted and magnified by the Palestinian leadership.
Those in the world who are convinced by the masquerade of righteous terrorism
encourage the murder and suicide bombing to continue.
Despite the horrendous circumstances we find ourselves in, we Jews refuse
to define ourselves by the hate of our enemy. We look toward the light,
toward a future where the masks are removed and the world understands
that our cause is one of justice, one of light, one of truth. Terrorism
is not borne of desperation. Terrorism is a strategy borne of hate, perpetuated
by a corrupt Palestinian leadership.
The cave where Koby was killed was formed from rainwater that slowly and
steadfastly through centuries carved its way through intransigent rock.
Monks, later in the 6th century, continued the work of carving, digging
out the cave to create a place of prayer, a place of holiness.
After we saw the hundreds of flickering candles in the cave, my husband
said to me: "This cave now feels holy."
The Jewish response to suffering is to sanctify life. It is my prayer
that all of our tears will allow us to steadfastly carve ourselves a homeland
of holiness, light, and peace, and that the world will understand the
truth of Arab terror. Arafat may wear the mask of a peacemaker but those
of us who live with the ravages of his peacemaking have seen his lies
unmasked: Terrorism is based on one thing - hate. Not despair, not hopelessness,
but hate that is taught in Palestinian schools, media, and culture. The
Palestinians have been trained to sanctify death. And until that distorted
belief is unmasked and transformed, there is no chance for peace.
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